As part of my healing program I read many books, which were a great source of help and support.
One book that clearly stands out is by Cookie Rodriguez entitled Please Make Me Cry. The amazing healing journey of a female drug addict. She was so hardened to life and so strong that nothing could make her cry.
As a child in a dysfunctional family, I learnt that crying was futile as it often would result in a physical blow followed by the words “I will give you something to cry about.” I saw tears as a weakness and I needed to be strong to survive.
My crying was contained inside of me. When I was alone and overwhelmed with sadness silent tears would surface, but I would not allow my body to fully engage in the act of crying and there was never any sobs. Silent crying, as I called it, was just another way I kept my true emotions under control.
It’s Healthy to Cry
Crying is often seen as a sign of weakness, however there are several health benefits to having a good cry and letting go of all the pent up emotions.
It is said that crying can:-
- Lift your spirit and improve your mood
4.Stimulate the production of endorphins
5.Detoxify the body
6.Restore emotional balance
I once had a client who came to the clinic for a treatment who was a medium and whilst I was carrying out the treatment he said” If you were to cry, you would never stop because you hold so many suppressed tears.” At the time I dismissed his words, as I was in denial as to the effect my childhood was still having on me, but he was right, I still don’t cry easily. The tears may come to my eyes but they seldom result in the act of crying.
Recently though, I watched the film Hachi. A true story which portrays the life of a faithful dog who had such a strong bond with his owner that he went with him everyday to the railway station where his owner boarded a train to travel into the city to teach at the university.
Hatchi would go home when the train had left and then return to the railway station each evening and wait for his owner to return. However his owner suffered a fatal heart attack, whilst delivering a lecture and never came back. Hachi returned to the station every day for nine years to wait for his owner to return. This act of loyalty was observed every day until Hachi was found dead in the snow at the railway station waiting for the train to arrive. He never gave up.
The loyalty of this very special dog spoke to me at a deep level. I likened my inner child to Hachi. As a child I was always trying to please my parents however much they neglected me, ignored me and hurt me. I believed that one day they would love me if I showed them how much I loved them.. The thought came to me that my inner child died in the same way as Hachi died; of a broken heart.
The story of Hachi was so healing it enabled me to cry for my hurting inner child and acknowledge how she had been so similar to Hachi.
I felt the sadness as each night his owner didn’t return. I became Hachi and experienced the pain he was feeling.
The film only reinforced my view that dogs have so much to teach us when it comes to healing a traumatic childhood by helping us discover and let go of deep hidden emotions.
If you are so hardened to life because of the trauma you experienced as a child, then it’s not too late to discover the healing benefits of crying. Contact me here to find out more about how I can help.